When that happens, big bloggers (you know, those fantastic writers with a million followers!) invite someone to be a guest on their blog. They have a guest or ghost blogger post something for them in their absence. Today, I would like to do the same. I have decided to share with you a journal post that my friend, Jane wrote for her own Caringbridge site today. By way of introduction, I will tell you a little bit about Jane, but out of respect for her and her story, I won't say too much.
Jane was my next- door neighbor for 5 years when Greg and I lived in Durham, NC back in the 90's.
Jane and her husband, Andy became so much more than neighbors, however. They were and are cherished friends. Jane was the kind of friend whose house you could walk into without knocking,
who rubbed your back (even while you were peeing!) for hours while you were in labor, and who loved and snuggled your babies like they were her own. Jane also was funny, whip smart, and full of energy all the time. Everyone did and does love Jane! Jane was diagnosed with breast cancer last week. She will have surgery this week followed by treatment to get rid of it or "kick it's ass!", as she says. She writes beautifully in general about her married life, with two teenage sons, and now living in the mountains of Western NC. But, her best writing always comes straight from her heart as evidenced here by her journal post on Caringbridge. Please join me in reading some wise words from Jane.
"I am a wreck today. The
adrenaline is pumping, my stomach is turning, I am cold then hot, I am
lightheaded and exhausted. It is not so much the surgery that scares me,
it is the pathology report and the "what ifs" that come after the
surgery. My meditation with Deepak gave me peace, but it only lasted about 15
minutes. Guess I will just do it throughout the day to help center me and
bring me back to the present.
The hospital just called and I have
to report there at 6:30 a.m. tomorrow. Yikes - I am not a morning person,
good thing my primal anxiety has me up and raring to go each morning. I
want to get this show on the road, but it is hard when you don't know where the
show is going.
A good friend of mine, who has been
through her own medical crisis with her husband, told me something very wise
the other day. She told me that people want to help and by asking for
their help I am actually giving them a gift. So, I've started my gift
giving! The church ladies are bringing dinner several nights this week.
Other local friends have lined up to transport Jake to and from choir over the
next few weeks. Jake loves choir so this is a particularly
wonderful help for us.
Here's another way everyone can help
- complain to me about your job, tell me your children are driving you crazy,
rave about a great book you've just read, ask me for advice, tell me a funny
story, describe the fabulous dinner you just cooked for your family, complain
about traffic or your mother-in-law or your spouse, bitch about the errands you
have to run and how behind you are with cleaning the house, ask me to buy
something for your child's fund raiser. After all, your lives are going
on - time did not stop when I got diagnosed with breast cancer.
Life is not all about me. If
everyone just talks to me about cancer I will die of boredom and so will
you. You think I don't want to hear about the mundane things of
life, but I do. I miss the mundane things of life and I want them
back.
So, how are things with you?"
